How do you behave on a first date? How about your first date ever?
One TikTok mom is getting some attention after she went viral with her plan to raise a son who would show respect to his future dates and know how to handle logistical matters like planning and paying the bill.
Other moms are chiming in to appreciate what she’s teaching her teen, and some say they’re stealing the idea.
Planning A Date Night
As adults, how many of us remember our first date ever? How many of us remember the anxiety around planning?
When you were 13 years old, did you know how much to expect to pay for a meal at a restaurant, how to make reservations, or what to do if the costs ran higher than expected?
When our 13-year-olds reach adulthood, will they know how to handle practical aspects, like making dinner reservations and planning their time to also go to a movie, and social norms, like holding the door for a date or knowing how to ask for the check?
This kid will.
How Does It Work?
Melissa Ann Marie, on TikTok, shares how she’s teaching her son to plan dates.
Once a month, she gives him a preset amount of money ($50 in this case) and lets him plan a date with her. He chooses the restaurant and other entertainment.
He’s also learning financial responsibility. In this case, he went over budget a bit.
One of the most important lessons he’s learning is to be thoughtful and make sure he’s considering entertainment that he and his date will both enjoy. In this case, he chose a cat cafe, not only because he knew they’d both have fun but because supporting the animals is a cause they both care about.
Then, they went for a walk on the beach and had tacos for lunch. Check out the video below.
The Lessons Are Great For Any Child
One mom in the comments asked how she could set up practice dates for her daughter since she’s been widowed and there isn’t currently a father figure to step in.
While social norms still lean towards specific gendered roles in dating, it’s important to note that regardless of gender, you can use an experience like this to teach your children valuable lessons.
Whether you’re teaching a son or daughter, you can teach them how to handle reservations, pay, order from a menu, and plan for time and costs. All kids can benefit from learning how to be polite to a date and how to handle social cues.
Regardless of gender, your kids can learn some safety rules for dates, including letting someone else (a parent or friend) know where you are and who you’re with.
Parent-Child Bonding Time Is A Bonus
The bonus: this mom spends one-on-one time with her kid once a month.
That means she’s increasing the chances that he’ll feel safe to come to her with his problems, whether related to dating, peer pressure, school, or anything else because she’s building trust and rapport.
Other moms add that she’ll be a great mother-in-law, which she says is the plan! Intentionally teaching your child to be a thoughtful and supportive partner will undoubtedly go a long way in improving future relationships with that child and his future partner and children!